Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Return to Zero, The Movie


In March, my friend, Lucy, sent me a message with a link and wrote, "Have you seen this?"

The link was to a website for Return to Zerothe movie.

I had not.

The theme of the film is something that is close to mine and Lucy's hearts but one that isn't spoken about, written about, or dwelt upon very often: STILLBIRTH.

Lucy and I "met" online through our mutual friend, Amy, in January of 2010. Amy called to ask me, mother of baby Jack, a STILLBORN baby, if I would mind contacting her friend who along with her husband, Mike, had twins a couple of months before. The babies were a boy and a girl. Their baby girl, Allie Grace, was born healthy, but their baby boy, James Michael, was STILLBORN.

Lucy needed a connection. She needed comfort. She needed direction. She needed someone to talk to that knew her pain. I would provide a little bit of all these things for Lucy, until she was able to find them closer to home and then she would eventually provide those things for some other mother who had experienced STILLBIRTH.

There are thousands of moms and dads just like Lucy and me. It isn't just something that USED to happen. You know, when the medical care wasn't good enough. A statistic is cited in the clip below that in the U.S. alone there are 26,000 STILLBIRTHS a year. That is:

500 pairs of empty mommy arms a month,

72 grieving daddies a day,

3 broken and heartsick sets of parents every hour.

The makers of this film would like to "break the silence" about STILLBIRTH specifically, but also all infant loss. Not everyone who experiences baby loss wants to talk about it but I think none of them wants it to be forgotten. I think the silence that needs to be broken is the one that feels like it is being imposed on those who have experienced the loss. It should be their choice whether to speak or to be quiet.

Even though I feel like I'm doing my own bit of "breaking the silence" now, after we lost Jack, I struggled to include him in my conversation. When I talked of him, I made others uncomfortable. Some, not all, would just walk away. Literally.

It is delicate. It is difficult. And as a result it is easier NOT to talk about it than to wade through the hard parts. I found out that once I got over sacrificing the memory of my beloved child for the sake of making someone else feel better, MOST were receptive. Sometimes they said something that was hurtful or ignorant, but in time, I found ways to let them know without making either of us feel embarrassed or hurt. Hopefully, the next time they encounter a similar situation, they will know what to say because I spoke.

While the subject of baby loss should never be blasé, it should be familiar enough that by being aware, we can help others.

Please watch this Glimpse of Return To Zero






I am a local leader for the film.  (Local leaders in MississippiAs a local leader, I have pledged to tell others about the film and help get it to theaters by gathering support for it.

You can see a map that shows local leaders nationally but this is a global effort. Individuals and groups from all around the world are signing up to be local leaders and pledging to go see this movie. If you would like to Become a Local Leader also, please do so.

You can pledge to see this movie by clicking on this link: Pledge to go see this movie

You can put my name in as local leader on your form: Anna Janzen-Lancaster

And by all means, please share it if you would like others to see it also.

http://bit.ly/16H3uNz



Disclaimer: I have NOT SEEN this movie and it is not rated yet. I can tell you that it does have some foul language and has adult situations. It is a film about adult life. If those things will keep you from seeing a movie, you probably won't want to see this one. You know that I have written before about how we try and limit our exposure to media of all types, especially for our children. Our children will not be seeing this movie. I don't want them or myself to be exposed to those things unnecessarily. But sometimes, to tell the REAL LIFE story, it is necessary, because that is how it REALLY happens. It is up to you. It is not my intention to force this film on you. Just to let you know it is out there and that it's subject matter, MATTERS.


Anna Becoming

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