It's Not A Burden, It's My Granny

For those of you that don't know, my Granny (Momma's momma) hasn't been doing very well as of late. About a year and a half ago, she had to leave her home and go stay with my mom and then my Aunt. Because of dementia and a body that was growing weaker with age, she didn't need to be by herself. Her mind and body have continued to slowly fade. She recently had a fall which has set many other problems and issues in motion. 

After a hospital visit, a week's (if it was that long) stay at a nursing home, and now another hospitalization, it has been decided that Granny will be moving in with we Lancasters. We are busy now readying our home for her. She should be with us early this coming week. The coming days will be an adjustment for us and I would like to ask you all to pray for us. 

I am a very fearful person. The Holy Spirit is constantly on duty driving away doubt and trembling from my soul. I don't watch the news because I can't bear to think about all the evil. My imagination can go a bit wild at times about what might seem to be something harmless to other people. I am very careful with my decisions because of all the possible consequences I see in the future. 

So, you would think that going to India or Africa on a medical mission would be out of the question. You would think that I wouldn't quit my job when I thought God wanted me to. You would think that the prospect of taking care of my Granny here at home without the help of monitors, aides, and supervision would scare me to death. 

Strangely, when it is something big that I know, that I know, that I know God wants me to to do, I become fearless. I guess it is when it gets SO big that I have no way of handling the situation myself, I quit worrying about how it will get done. I just trust He'll take care of it. I know that I need to know that with the everyday things too, and I'm working on that. But for now I'll just be glad that this right now doesn't scare me. 

This even kind of makes some things make sense that didn't before. Like I told you, I know that God wanted me to quit my part-time job in December. I did. I kept waiting for another job to open up for me but it never did. I tried my best to make it happen for me, thinking He probably needed my help. :)

But I am now in a position to care for Gran when I wouldn't have been before. He brought me to where I needed to be before I needed to be there. Isn't He good? Isn't it wonderful that He surprised me and called me to be a nurse 10 years ago when it had never crossed my mind before?

I realize that what we are about to do is going to be difficult. The longer I live though, the more I'm convinced that nothing worth doing is going to be easy. This will probably try my faith and character more than anything has yet. I can not promise that I will not fail miserably at times. But I am willing to try and be as good of a care giver to her as she was to us.

My children love their Granny and I am glad that they will be able to spend a lot of time with her. They are great kids and I am so proud of them for being so unselfish as to want me to be able to take care of Gran. Eric is being very brave and will be sacrificing much as well. My mom and my aunts will be anxious for us and will have some adjusting to do trusting me with their mom. Would you especially remember and pray for each of them? We will all need courage, strength, patience, kindness, selflessness, and a great deal of love to make this work the way God intended. 

I've been reading The King's Speech by Mark Logue and Peter Conradi. It is about how Lionel Logue, a speech therapist, helped King George with his speech impediment and fear of public speaking throughout the King's adulthood and reign. There are several excerpts of the king's speeches in the book. I enjoy reading them and several of them have portions that touch me greatly. 

One is from King George VI's Christmas broadcast of 1942 when England and the world were at war. He states that President Abraham Lincoln used to tell of a boy who was carrying an even smaller boy up a hill. Asked whether the heavy burden was not too much for him, the boy answered: ''It's not a burden, it's my brother!''

It stuck with me especially this last week or so when I tell people that we are going to be caring for Granny here at home. I know it is in kindness that people gasp and say, "Isn't that going to be hard?"or "How are you going to do that?" But I'd like you not to be afraid for us either. I know you care about me and might want to gently tell me that what is ahead of me will be hard. I know it will be and I know that God will take care of it. He is already working on my support system: my mom, my aunts, my sisters, their husbands, my brother and sister-in-law, a friend to help me with house work, my precious praying friends like you, and on and on. So, when I get discouraged later or am having a bad day, I'd like for you to remind me of what I KNOW. (Only of course after you have listened long and petted me a bit. :))

The best way I know to explain my fearlessness and even excitement about what God is doing and about to do in our lives is that "it's not a burden, it's my Granny".

A picture so you can see Granny in your mind's eye when you pray for her. Oh, and some folks used to call her Nellie, but she's always been Granny to me. God knows wither way. :)

Anna Becoming